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Prose Parade
Grammar and writing basics


I just wanted to read my newspaper.

Here I was, reading my LA Times (what remains of it), and smack–right in the face (or eye) a misplaced modifier. Here’s the sentence: “Intriguingly, both orbit the same star, a dwarf 20 light-years from Earth called Gliese 581, European researchers said Tuesday.” So, what does “intriguingly” modify?

Intriguingly is an adverb. It modifies verbs, other adverbs and adjectives. I repeat, what does “intriguingly” modify? Orbit? The planets intriguingly orbit? Nah. Called? The star is intriguingly called? Well, Gliese 581 is different, but un-huh. Is there any other adverb, adjective or verb it maybe, sorta, kinda can modify. Nope. So, what to do?

Kill that offending adverb, and the sentence is just fine. It gives the information, which is what newspapers are supposed to do. Or, the writer could have written, “It’s intriguing that two such similar planets orbit the same star.” (What’s so intriguing about these two planets orbiting the same star is another question altogether.)

I’m withholding the writer’s name to protect his reputation as a competent writer on what used to be a world-class newspaper.

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admin
Date:
April 22, 2009 um 2:21 pm
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2 Comments »

  1. Phil

    “Intriguingly, both orbit the same star, a dwarf 20 light-years from Earth called Gliese 581, European researchers said Tuesday.” So, what does “intriguingly” modify?

    Kill that offending adverb, and the sentence is just fine.

    I love this blog and share your horror at some of the outrageous misuses of English that you highlight. I would have to disagree with the above sentence being “just fine” without “intriguingly”.

    European researchers said on Tuesday, surely. For my part I would probably have preferred to start with “European researchers said on Tuesday that…”, although that may not have been appropriate in context.

    #1 Comment vom 21. June 2010 um 2:29 am

  2. admin

    Phil,

    thanks for the kind words about my sometimes on again/sometimes off again blog. Everything depends on whether I find freelance work or not and whether something has pulled my chain.

    About “said on” or “said”: In newspapers (at least in the U.S.) journalists are taught to omit that “on” as unnecessary. Also, the first part of the Ws will be the most important. Here it’s the star and its satellites not the researchers. Here endeth the Journalism 101 lesson.

    #2 Comment vom 23. July 2010 um 12:29 pm

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